What do you do after you fail is what will determine your future

What you do after you fail is what will determine your future

I have just arrived at Casa de Campo, in La Romana, Dominican Republic. There is a world outside Casa de Campo and another world inside Casa de Campo.

When you go inside that beautiful resort, you see some of the most beautiful houses in the world. It is a huge place and you go everywhere in a little golf cart. There are golf carts everywhere and you rent them for $29.00 a day. I find it a very steep price, but since there is no competition, that is the best I can get.

I am attending the wedding of my friend’s daughter who in turn has been my daughter’s friend since they were kids in kindergarten.
About 85 people are here, must from Colombia, Miami and San Juan with a lone young lady from Amsterdam.

The first activity is in a beautiful house down two houses from Sammy Sosa’s house in Bahia Minitas.

We were the first to arrive and since there wasn’t anyone there, we went into the kitchen to say hi to the cooks and waiters working the party. I start a conversation with a young man and we start talking about sports. I tell him that I attended the Pan American Games in the Dominican Republic in 2003 and he tells me that he participated. He was the fastest man in the Dominican Republic and he ran the 100 meters. He then tells me that he had two false starts and was disqualified. In other words, he spends years training very hard for that race and he doesn’t even have a chance to compete because of a false start.

If he had raced and he had won or at least gotten a medal, I doubt that he would be serving tables and working as a waiter. Obviously, he gave up and didn’t continue competing and since he didn’t win, he couldn’t benefit from lucrative contracts or a career as a celebrity.

I haven’t met a great successful person that hasn’t failed not once, but many times in life. Failure is part of success but it will always depend on how you handle it.

Hayley McGregory in 2004 finished third in the backstroke event, .7 seconds from first place. That means that she didn’t qualify for the Olympics in Greece. She was devastated.
She finished third in the 200 meter backstroke by .54, less than one second also.

Hayley went back into training for the 2008 Olympics in Beijing.

She was given the opportunity to represent Great Britain since she is also a British citizen and in that team it would have been much easier to qualify since it is a weaker team.
Her answer was NO. That would be a sign of weakness and she was determined to make
the US team.

In the preliminaries she broke the world record in the 100 meter backstroke and qualified for the finals.
That night, in the finals, she came in third, this time by .2 seconds.
In the 200 meters backstroke, you can imagine, she came in third.
She had to watch the Beijing Olympics in the television set.
Four times in eight years, she has come in third and missed the opportunity to compete in the Olympics.
What is Hayley doing now? She is training for the 2012 Olympics in London.

This young lady hasn’t given up! No matter what happens in the 2012 trials, she will always be remembered for her persistence. In fact, if all else fails, she can become a motivational speaker because she has a heck of a story.

This young man, failed in one race and he gave up. He now is a waiter taking care or people and waiting for a tip.

But what is very important, is that he had a choice. Just like Hayley had the choice of quitting or of continuing to race, this young guy had a choice to continue training and trying to win a medal.

Remember when you were a teenager? You probably couldn’t wait to grow up. I bet you fought for freedoms and privileges that come with adulthood didn’t you? “Mom, please, treat me as an adult”, “why do I have to go to bed so early”? “Don’t you trust me?” “Let me borrow your car”, “I need to make my own decisions”. This is natural and it happened to all of us.

But then, something happened. You grew up (chronologically I mean since some have not grown up at all, go to our legislature and you will see what I mean) and you found out that with all those freedoms and privileges you were fighting for, come a bunch of responsibilities. Many more rules to follow, not less. Very soon, the world was holding you accountable for your actions and your results.

Well, here is the way the world works: Unless someone is pointing a machine gun at your chest, every action, every thought you hold is your choice. This is true in your personal life and in your professional one. You choose how to behave, how to conduct yourself, how to work within a team, how to treat your clients and even how you react when others provoke you or because you stress. You choose the level of integrity, honesty and the values you will spouse while at work. You will become a responsible member of society or a deadbeat. You will fail many times and what you do and how you conduct yourself after failing is your choice.

The important point here is that there will always be consequences to each and every choice we make. If you make a bad choice, you will pay for it sooner or later. You might try to blame others and for a while, it may work but believe me, sooner or later everyone will catch up and the blame will fall on your shoulders. Having the “it’s the other guy’s fault” victim mentality will lead you very far away from where you want to be.
We all want to be successful. No one wakes up in the morning and says “how can I screw it up today”? I am sure that most of us wake up wanting to do a good job. If we take responsibility for ourselves and our choices we will be a step ahead. We must choose well of course, but even if we make a wrong choice and take responsibility for it, we can learn from our mistakes and most likely will not repeat it.

I am a collector of quotes from famous and not so famous people. Let me share a couple with you:

“For true success ask yourself these four questions: Why? Why not? Why not me? Why not now?” Analyze this quote. Analyze the profound meaning of what James Allen communicated to us with these simple questions.

How about this one for those that believe that success will come without much sacrifice:
The elevator to success is out of order. You will have to use the stairs…one step at a time. Joe Girard.